Many pregnancy centers serve women with abortion healing programming, but one multi-location pregnancy center has been adding other forms of reproductive loss support to its service repertoire.
Living Alternatives Pregnancy Resource Center, with locations in both Indiana and Illinois, has a specific program for perinatal grief support named “Willow Story.”
Paula Scott is the director of Perinatal Grief Support for Living Alternatives.
“One of our big [commitments] with Living Alternatives is that we're here for her,” Scott said. “There's a lot of pregnancies that end in loss and we're all about the pregnancy journey and about caring for her.”
Scott recalled they did have a small program earlier on, but it was not well utilized. The need for a more robust program was recognized, she said, after a center volunteer encounter with a client who had miscarried. The volunteer was confirming client appointments over the phone when Scott and the center director overheard the volunteer complete a call saying, ‘Oh, I'm so sorry. We won't bother you anymore.’ When asked, the volunteer shared that the client had miscarried, and the volunteer had told her the center didn't have anything for her.
The experience “really struck me hard,” Scott said.
Living Alternatives’ Willow Story “tree” has three “branches” of care services: Prenatal Diagnosis, Pregnancy & Infant Loss, and Current Loss.
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The Prenatal Diagnosis program is available virtually to residents of 24 states. The loss programming is available at their clinic locations and virtually for anyone who needs them, whether they are too far to drive or just don’t want to come to a center where other clients are still pregnant.
The Prenatal Diagnosis Branch involves serving families facing any form of prenatal diagnosis as a Parent Care Coordinator (PCC), which went through the national training program for PCCs by prenatal diagnosis advocacy non-profit Be Not Afraid. Parent Care Coordinators are trained to handle all types of prenatal diagnosis - whether the child may possibly have a disability, a treatable condition, or a life-limiting diagnosis.
Willow Story accepts referrals for clients from both Be Not Afraid’s website and from the website PrenatalDiagnosis.org.
Parent Care Coordinators help the family with accompaniment, connections to second opinions, and birth planning from diagnosis to delivery and for a year after delivery - whether the family lost their child or are navigating special needs or celebrating a healthy child. This program is particularly important because clients facing prenatal diagnosis often get pressure from medical professionals to abort - sometimes over and over.
“Often [at] every appointment they go to, they're confronted with that termination option,” Scott said. “The medical providers often are giving the worst-case scenario for whatever they're seeing to the family.
“Through Be Not Afraid we have connections with other specialists who are pro-life,” she said. “So, we can say, sometimes it's I don't think it's as bad as you're hearing.”
The Pregnancy and Infant Loss Branch involves peer support appointments that are scheduled at clients’ preferred location or virtually.
Scott has trained every center to have a point person for this service, and she herself recommends a monthly appointment for up to a year, or longer as needed. Clients are taken through a workbook curriculum that helps educate about and process grief. Scott noted how one client has been seeing her for years through repeat losses. She’s pregnant again now, and hopeful about this pregnancy.
“We start them out just kind of talking about journaling and grief journaling and how that applies to what you're doing, telling your story.” Scott explained. “We talk about grief cycles. We talk about the difference between male and female grief and how that affects your relationship.
Other things discussed include healthy self-care, how clients can take care of themselves as God's created being, keeping memories and memorial dates like, such as a would-be birth date, a due date, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Christmas, and other holidays.
Willow Story also provides comfort boxes for after a loss, including a place to save the ultrasound picture and, if clients are under 20 weeks, a certificate of life, since most states don’t provide any certificates of any kind for miscarriage.
The Current Loss branch involves the smaller number of clients in the middle of loss.
These are those that come in for an ultrasound and see no heartbeat or who are headed to the hospital for an induction, which is prescribed in the case of 2nd or 3rd trimester miscarriage.
Scott is considering expanding this branch in the future with additional birth preparation. She has also partnered with two area funeral homes willing to offer free cremation services.
Scott described options for memorializing children lost to miscarriage, mementos to help parents treasure the time they have with their baby.
“We offer a big white gift box, and we personalize each one of those with blankets and hats and if they're going for delivery, then they have the ink pad to do handprints and footprints [and] a little baggie to get their lock of hair,” Scott said.
All three branches recognize an opportunity for pregnancy centers to step further into grief ministry.
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Willow Story has begun presenting its program to other pregnancy centers and is willing to share the program materials with other centers interested in using them as a guide to implementing their own program. A nearby pregnancy center has decided to refer their clients to Willow Story for ongoing care but still asked Scott for training on how their mentors can meet women in the moment of loss with compassionate language.
For Scott, familiarity with loss naturally belongs at a pregnancy center.
“We need to care for her whether she delivers a happy healthy baby or she doesn't,” Scott said. “That's part of a pregnancy journey.”
Editor's note: Heartbeat International manages Pregnancy Help News and was part of the establishment of PrenatalDiagnosis.org.
